Try Try Try

I’m currently vibrating with energy.  It happens whenever I accomplish something that I didn’t think was possible.   My trainer has been slowly introducing me to different exercises on a ball.  This has been a challenge in general because I had to get over my fear that the ball wouldn’t actually hold my weight even when the specs said that it would.  Now that I trust that the ball will my lovely trainer has been pushing the boundaries a little bit more.

harder than it looks especially if you are laughing

I love that I can goof around with my trainer.  She has been a great match

Another YMCA staff who has become a friend :-)

This exercise was both mentally and physically challenging.  She had me roll down from sitting into the bridge and then roll back up to sit again.  I was pretty sure there was no way it was going to happen.  I was giggling out of sheer nervousness.  I had to put a lot of trust in my trainer because she told me that I could do it.  Although my brain was screaming there was no way I tried it anyway.  The first one was horrible.  I rolled down laughing and shaking but when it came to trying to roll back up fear kicked in as my head and shoulders left the ball and were floating in air.  I was pretty sure I was going to fall backwards and crack my skull open.  But very ungracefully and with the help of my trainer I got back up and tried again.  The second time it was much easier because my body knew that my legs would hold me when I was in the bridge.  I still struggled a bit to roll back up into sitting but did it the second time.  Then the third and fourth were almost easy because I knew I could do it and because I wanted photos.  It’s not every day you can document a truly important moment.  I experience a lot of them at the gym but usually don’t get pictures of it.

There is no proof more powerful of the progress I’m making than when I can do something that my brain says I can’t.  When I first decided to live my year with no fear in 2014 this was what I was looking for.  I was looking for those moments where I was worried, scared, nervous or just plain convinced I couldn’t do something so that I could push through them.  Logically I knew that this was the best way to grow and learn but it wasn’t then and still isn’t an easy mantra to live by but it is one that gets me the best results.  Pushing through the things that scare me has helped me to grow my confidence in more ways than I probably even realize.  It has helped me to learn more and more about my body and what it is capable of.  It has helped to change my world.

When I remember tonight later on what I want to remember is the following:

1. Sometimes you just have to trust the people you have hired to help you

2. Your mind is a powerful tool and it needs to be on your side

3. Laughter makes everything better…well it does make holding the bridge harder but if I wasn’t laughing I probably never would have done it :-)

4. I am able to do anything if I can just learn to trust myself and be okay if I can’t do it perfect.

5. Most important always just try because you might just surprise yourself.

I’m so proud every day of the work I have been doing.  I love how my body is changing.  I also love how my mind is changing.  I feel like I’m truly growing into the woman I was meant to be.

 

Right before joining the gym and now.  Not a perfect comparison but it is pretty apparent my body is changing